This is my first day back in Moorhead from Matthew Sweeney (MS)'s workshop. This morning, I did full primary and second up to Ardha Matsyendrasana in my practice room. As I practiced, I tried to recall MS's adjustments and directions in various postures, particularly the backbends of the Intermediate Series. I have mixed feelings to be practicing by myself again after a few days of mysore practice with MS and fellow workshop participants. It feels good to be practicing by myself, listening closely to everything that is arising in my mind and body; but I also miss the feeling of being given constant feedback under the watchful eye of MS, not to mention the powerful camaraderie of practicing alongside others who are on the same journey.
Coming back from a workshop always feels like returning to the surface after a deep-sea diving trip--a diving trip to the inner recesses of one's mind, body and spirit, where one discovers things that one never knew existed. Some of these things are beautiful, wondrous hidden (sunken?) treasures; others are scary sea monsters or skeletons one never knew were buried in the depths. In either case, having known of their existence, one can no longer undo or unlearn this knowledge, but must live with it, and do one's best to learn and grow as much as possible from this knowledge.
But first, one must decompress, and allow oneself to readjust to the atmosphere at the surface. Which is what I am doing now. There is actually also another level of decompression going on: Coming back from a big city to this little corner of the midwest always requires a couple of days of readjusting, on my part. As I write this, my inner ears are popping with the atmospheric change. :-)